Written by Dr. Sanjana V.B Bhms,dbrm,cdn

Founder & medical director of siahmsr wellness.in

All rights reserved with siahmsr digital healthcare[siahmsr wellness]

Reviewed by SIAHMSR medical team

Parenting- school going children [9-11years]

Parenting for school going children

  Parenting is the process of raising children and providing them with protection and care in order to ensure their healthy development into adulthood. Parenting or child rearing promotes and supports the physical, emotional, social, spiritual and cognitive development of a child from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the intricacies of raising a child and it is more than a biological relationship between parents and offspring.

  Parenting is an arduous task, particularly when children enter into a new phase of their lives. The school going children confront an entirely new surroundings and unfamiliar people with different behavioral patterns. Parental support and communication is important in the healthy development of children.

  According to American psychology association parenting practices share three major goals globally:

·       Ensuring children’s health and safety

·        Preparing children for life as productive adults

·        Transmitting cultural values. 

Parenting is a very crucial element in the healthy development of children. The quality of parenting matters so much in the mental and physical development of children.

     Foster a positive and friendly environment at home being sensitive and responsive to your children, which can definitely help to build a healthy relationship between you and children.

Why is it so important to build a bond with your child?

Strong family relationship is important, with expression of emotional bonding through sensitive, responsive, and consistent parenting in the first years of life. For instance, closely hug your child whenever he or she is in problem and hear their problems calmly and respond to them with effective solutions. This is known as building up a “secure attachment.” Securely attached children are seemingly more capable of dealing with adverse circumstances arising in life such as financial setbacks, family instability, parental stress, and depression etc.

    Continued absence of parents may generate in children the feeling of insecurity, rejection or feeling of being ignored. This may later lead to prefer loneliness or emotional outburst on silly or trivial matters in these children.  At some phase they may even stop attempting to compete for their parent’s attention and start to lose emotional connections to their parents. Detachment begins to develop.

How to develop coping skills in your children?

   As children grow and start learning to manage their feelings and behavior, parents must help them to develop coping skills, like active problem solving. Such skills can help them feel confident in handling problems arising later in life. Here parenting is very crucial beyond the level of “secure attachment”.

Coping skills should be inculcated in children boosting their confidence and independence.

 Parents can engage positively with their children, teaching them the behaviors and skills that they need to cope with the life situations. Children gradually start learning to follow rules and control their own feelings. Parenting skills and behaviors help parents in leading children into healthy adulthood and development of the child's social skills.

                           SIAHMSR                                       

What is positive parenting?

Parenting includes the physical, mental and social development of children into adulthood.

The cognitive potential, social skills, and behavioral functioning a child acquires during the early years are positively correlated with the quality of their interactions with their parents. That is their intellectual and mental abilities, social skills and behaviour  are determined by their parental interactions or simply parenting.

   Positive parenting is a buzzword now that is used in common parlance to describe parenting practices.

Positive parenting is defined in different ways. One definition of positive parenting is as follows:

A parent-child relationship that is “responsive to child’s needs and feelings and combines warmth and thoughtful, firm limit setting consistently over time”.

Positive parenting is associated with many benefits. Various evidence based studies substantiates that:

·       Positive parenting has positive influence on child’s behavior. It helps to lower the levels of aggression and other forms of challenging behavior in children.

·       Positive parenting gives respect to your child’s independence. It gives the child freedom to make choices, to make their own mistakes, understand it and learn to rectify it. For example, let them choose the clothes they want to wear, games they want to play etc.  It allows them to decide the order of tasks in their daily routines.

 Positive parenting tips

      According to Centers for disease control and prevention [CDC] certain parenting practices listed below may help child development & behavior effectively.

·       Provide your child every appropriate opportunity for playing and learning so that they can develop their skills.

·         Improve their linguistic skill and cognitive or mental abilities teaching new words.

·        Teach your children about emotions and how to manage their emotions and feelings.

Emotional intelligence is a new buzzword now in areas related to career and parenting. Emotional intelligence or how to deal with emotions is equally important as IQ or intelligence quotient.

·       Always respond to queries from children. Try to be sensitive to their emotions and curiosity to know new things .Every time respond to them consistently well which may generate a great emotional bonding between you and your child.

·        A healthy warm and loving approach towards your child is important. Express explicitly your affection, care and love towards them.

·       Appreciate your child for their efforts.

 Children need appreciation to grow. Praise and encourage their efforts and hard work in every good task. 

·       Effective communication or interaction between children and parents is crucial. Practice or spend quality time with your child every day and listening and responding to them. Ask your child about school, friends, and the expectations of your child.

·       Inculcate certain habits in your children. Discuss with your child about respecting others and helping people in need.

·       Show your affection towards your child. Understand their problems in the new school environment and discuss it. Recognize and appreciate the accomplishments of your child.

·       Inculcate in your child a sense of responsibility.

Ask your child to get involved in household tasks at least partially. It is very important for children to understand their responsibilities also.

·       Help your child set his or her own achievable goals

Goal setting and attempting to achieve them may boost sense of pride or confidence on achieving something by own efforts. This may also teach your child a lesson that rely less on approval or reward from others. Believing in oneself and one’s abilities is important.

·       Teach your child about mastering the skill of “patience” in life. This can be executed by letting others go first or by finishing a task before going out to play.

·       Encourage him to think about possible consequences before acting. This may help to boost the analytical potential of mind.

  ·       Make some clear rules for your children regarding screen time. Be clear about the period of time spending with gadgets. Spend time with children and family playing games, reading, and going to events nearby.

·       Try to be in contact with your child’s school. Meet the teachers and staff and get to understand their learning goals to help the growth of your child.

·       Continue reading to your child since toddler age. As your child learns to read, take “turns reading” to each other. This can enhance the linguistic and communicative skill of your child. 

·       Use discipline to guide and protect your child, rather than punishment to make him feel bad about himself. Follow up any discussion about what not to do with a discussion of what to do instead. Praise your child for good behavior. 

·       Encourage your child in taking on new challenges. Helping them to solve problems is important.

·       Encourage your child to join school and community groups, such as a team sports, or to take advantage of volunteer opportunities.

Safety

•   In order to improve the road safety on the way to school, teach your child to watch out for traffic. Children must know how to be safe when walking to school, riding a bike, and playing outside.

•   Give some lessons on swimming with a trainer. Make sure your child understands water safety, and always supervise while swimming or playing near water.

•   teach your children how to ask for help when in urgency.

•   Keep potentially harmful household products, tools, equipment, and firearms out of your child’s reach.

Health priorities

·       Ensure your child is physically active and do 1 hour or more of physical activity each day.

·       Practice healthy eating habits and physical activity early. Encourage active play, and be a role model by eating healthy at family mealtimes and having an active lifestyle.

·       Ensure your child gets adequate sleep.

 Written by Dr.Sanjana vb[copyright]

 References

1.  https://www.britannica.com/topic/parenting  

2.  https://www.apa.org/topics/parenting  

3.https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/childdevelopment/positiveparenting/index.html   

4.https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/childdevelopment/positiveparenting/infants.html    

5.  https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2017/09/positive-parenting